2009...Lord move...or move me

There is a song that says.....Lord move in a way that I have never seen before....because there's a moutain in the way and a lock on the door. So Lord move or....move me. The song puts on a whole new perspective as I sat here today and I was looking out at the mountains I recall Jesus telling them that if they had faith...even faith as small as a mustard seed "you can say to this mountain to move from here to there and it will move, nothing will be impossible with you." I look at all we have been through in 2008. It has been a tough year. But then I wonder if I would have taken authority over the victory and battle already won, and told "our mountain" to move from here to there, what would 2008 have looked like. Would it have taken on another perspective all together. 2009 is sure to hold all kinds of moutains of its own, the question is.....would I rather climb them...or just maybe MOVE them.

Happy 2009. And may the mountains in your life be moved or may God move you.

You just may be taking a walk....

There is an old chinese proverb that says "if a man thinks he leading, but turns to find that no one is following.....than he is only taking a walk." Where are you with that? As Christ followers should he not turn to find us following along close behind. Should our tracks not mimic his, should we not be as a child searching out the footprint that he left before us and attempt to walk in that very step?

I had to laugh today. As I was walking from the farm house down to the horse barn....to my right was a single horse in a fenced area....to my left were two goats. As I began to walk by them, they scurried over to the fence and begin to follow me the whole way down to the barn. And then I began to wonder, why were they so motivated to follow me? I could sense their anticipation. The horse even began to trot in circles when he reached the end of his fence. The goats made all their naying noises that they could make. Why such anticipation.... It was because they knew who their keepers where, they knew that when they saw a person that they were going to be fed, that they were getting ready to receive life nourishment from their master.

Where did we miss this along the way. Most days are filled with one of those very moments that God invites us to follow him, on most days we miss it.....we have filled our to do list so full, our schedules so tight...that even following God gets lost in the shuffle. I blog not for your benefit....but for my benefit...because just like you I could very easily go through the day and have totally missed where God wanted me to go, what he wanted me to see. But my committing to this daily entry.....I focus daily on the blessings God wants me to recognize. How many times today has God tried to show you something...something so profound but yet so simple, that you didn't even take the time to notice..it's time to wake up, because I don't want Him to turn around on the day that He calls me home and find that I hadn't even been following. He isn't just taking a walk in my life....He is my life.

When the Spirit moves...

Some of my most fondest memories are of my mother having me lay on the dining room floor on a beautiful spring or fall day, we would lay in the floor underneath an open window and just lie there and feel the breeze blow over us. I don't really recall much of what was said or even if a word was uttered by either one of us. But just to lay there and feel the warmth of the breeze blow across us. Last night as we slept in our grandaughters bed, I could hear the wind blow outside her bedroom window....almost as if it were beckoning for me to open the window and allow it in. I opened the window and I just lay down on the floor beneath the window, the breeze was so warm, so refreshing, so mesmerizing....the long curtain would barely brush past my face with each gust of breeze that came. As I lay there...my thoughts we're of how much the breeze is like the holy spirit. You can't see it, you can't touch it.....but its presence cannot be denied. After feeling its warmth who can deny it's presence, who would not long to feel it again and again. I think of when John the baptist baptized Jesus in Luke 3:22 "and as he was praying, heaven was opened and the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form like a dove." I can only imagine the breeze from heaven as the heavens open and the Holy Spirit descends on Jesus. Those moments with my mom on the floor....are something I will never forget. Those moments lying on the floor feeling the Holy Spirit move.....are moments no one can forget.

A time for connecting...

Has there ever been that special place in your life...where the distractions of this world seem to dissolve into the floorboards. This place for me just happens to be in North Carolina. Our dear friends own a farm that has long since been occupied. On this farm is a professional horse stable, that once held most likely over 30 some horses at one time. But its the hay barn that has always captured my heart. There is something so quiet, so peaceful about the faintest smell of hay, and the old fashioned wide plank floors, with the hint of sunlight beaming through each crack in the walls. The silentness makes God's voice beam through nearly as bright as the sunlight. I could spend hours just soaking in everything around me. So my anticipation for tomorrow is like a kid the night before Christmas. Equipped with my bibles and ready to just sit (kneel) in his presence, and in the quietness hear only his voice...is such an exciting time for me. Lord I want to hear your voice, I want you to still the world around me, block out all that is not you. Allow me to hear only you. Speak to your willing servant. Not that I am able, but because you are. I long to hear your voice, may your will prosper in my hands, not for my gain....but for your glory.

What is life that he is mindful of it.....

What is life.....that he is mindful of it? Life is but a glimmer....its fading the moment it begins. As new as the poppy is in the spring....it too has a season. We too, have such a season, such a time, such a moment. I never really thought of myself as a people watcher. But the older I get the more I find myself observing and pondering what we do or don't do that makes all the difference. I hear the interaction across an isle at the supermarket of a hurried mother and a curious child, I wish she...as I could have been...a little bird above looking down at the moment. What we miss...what I missed. I want to say to the mother.....do you know what you have just missed in that moment? What curiosity you have stolen from your child. Why can we not see from their perspective. Even Jesus had to remind the people that "unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." I sat across the table from my 5 year old grandaughter tonight as she talked about "all the people being beautiful" and her daddy said "I wish we all could be beautiful," she turns to him with all the seriousness a five year can muster and said so sincerely "daddy, you are beautiful." Where have we failed, with the eyes of a child. Why do we see the world and see bitterness, anger and rage.....but they see beautiful. Have we became to busy to notice. I know that the word says "train up a child in the way it should go" but wonder sometimes if they aren't training us...more than we train them sometimes. This next year, I vow to have the "heart of a child"...may I see the people and call them "beautiful".

The B....attitudes

Ok, ok....yeah I know it is really the Beatitudes. But if I were graded today I probably would only get a B on my attitudes. Why was I thinking of this? Well I guess because I was thinking this holiday season of the poor, those who are mourning, those that are hungry and those that are thirsty. Which somehow led me to the Beatitudes. It was out of this time that he taught his disciples on the B-attitudes. Ok....beatitudes.

Matt 5:3

Blessed are the poor in spirit-poor in spirit...not as we see poor, but not seeing ourselves to highly-for theirs is the kingdom of heaven

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted

Blessed are the meek-mild in nature, submissive to his will-for they will inherit the earth.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness-always seeking more of him-for they will be filled

Blessed are the merciful-those that show mercy-for they will be shown mercy (thats where I definately get a B)

Blessed are the pure in heart-continually seeking a heart like his-for they will see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God

Blessed are those that are persecuted because of righteousness-if you're not feeling persecution-ask yourself am I doing all I can be doing for God right now in my life-nearly everyone that stepped out of their comfort zone to follow God endured persecution of some sort-for theirs is the kingdom of heaven Wow, when I look at the list that Christ gave the disciples I see that I'm not sure if I even earned the B. Maybe that will be my New Years Resolution this year. Perhaps 2009 I will begin to work on my grades....after all I have the best teacher....money can't buy.

To Us a Child is Born....

It' midnight as I write tonight. My thoughts are on this little hand, grabbing hold of his father's hand.....I am in awe of the sacrifice. For what we see is what we know of the miracles Jesus performed during his time here. We see a strong man, a man worthy enough to be called king, a man without blemish or stain. But yet he came as a little baby.....and behold she brought forth a son....and his name...his name will be called Emmanuel, God with us.


Isaiah prophesied of the coming king in Isaiah 9 "For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the goverment will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." And just as it was written by the prophets, God sent His one and only son to be a sacrifice for our sin. As I studied this picture I can only imagine that after the birth of Jesus that the very hand of God reached out to touch his son, to hold the very one that he would soon sacrifice. I still see that hand reaching out, but this time it's Jesus' hand, and today he is reaching out to hold ours just as his father did for him. This Christmas I am so thankful for the hand of God in my life. No gift could ever compare....to give my only child, my only son.....who but God could give such a gift.

Beyond Christmas....

I truly love Christmas. The celebration of the Christ child given to take away our sins..... But I wonder where His thoughts are tonight. We anticipate the season with so much enthusiasm so much expectation. But He's been there done that. It was a no brainer for Him. He came with purpose and left with anticipation of better things yet to come.

I don't know what I look forward to more...the celebration of his first coming or the anticipation of his second coming. . Something we so often forget about. We celebrate his life but often forget that his life is not over.....it is being lived daily in the hearts of the legacy that he has left behind. My thoughts are filled with such anticipation and excitement today. Revelation 22:7 says "Behold, I am coming soon!" Can I say....that to me that makes me want to run to the highest mountain and fall to my knees in waiting for his return But I believe we have been called as Christ followers to such as time as this. Ezekiel 40:4 says Son'of man look with your eyes pay attention to everything I am going to show you for that has been why you have been brough her. God has clearly called us to a time such as this.

We celebrate the birth and then we celebrate the resurrection of Christ at easter. But where is the focus the rest of the year. The bible says we will not know the day or hour of his return, but only the signs of the times. "Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom.There will be great earthquakes, famines and pestilences in various places, and fearful events and great signs from heaven." Luke 21:10-11. As Christ followers will we allow this special event of a child given to take away our sins be wasted by not sharing the good news of him coming again ...one last time to take us to a place of golden streets, gates made of pearls, crystal clear water and jewels that we could not fathom with our limited perspective. So this Christmas lets see beyond Christmas and see what he really came for......to provide us hope for a future grander than any of our plans.

Living Water all week long...

I thought about this today. Is it possible to drink a glass of water and go the rest of the week with not one more drop. Our bodies would soon become dehydrated, we would soon lose energy, soon we would be unable to focus on even the mundane task. Water....is essential....without it our bodies cannot function. Without it every system begins to shut down. But yet so many Christ followers do just that. We attend church on Sunday morning....take a drink of the water that is offered and then begin to plow through our weeks, expecting to be refreshed and ready to tackle the world.

Christ said in John 7:37 "If anyone is thristy, let him come to me and drink." "Come to Me." What is it that we turn to the moment we walk out of the church building on a sunday morning? Are we "in the world" or are we "of the world." When we thrist during the week, where do we turn? God gave us thrist? Because without thirst we would not seek water. But he has told us that if we drink of the "water" that "He" gives us... we will never thirst again. In Jeremiah 2:13 the Lord says " my people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water."

Have you ever been through one of those weeks where you knew something was missing, something just wasn't right? You tried to fill the days with what you thought you needed to accomplish but there still seemed to be something missing. Many Christ followers today, do just that. They attend church on sunday and travel the rest of the week on that one glass of water. Never to tap into the well again. They do this week after week after week. Then they wonder why he fails them. Who's the one failing. He gives freely of his water, we just need to go to the tap to get a drink.

Where will you go when you get thirsty this week?

What happened to fear & trembling

We never turn the news on right after church. Why today? We got home happened to turn on the news and CNN was still going on about Rick Warren and the US people's aversion to him being involved in the inauguration. As I stood there and listened to them, I couldn't help but wonder, if the heavens parted today....and Christ was coming on his cloud, and the trumpets were sounding. What would they be saying. Would they still be protesting their gay rights, would they still be fighting for abortion, would they still be demanding their ways? Where has our focus gone? Where has our fear and trembling gone?

I did a study about a year ago, through the proverbs. As I began the study my thoughts really were, how can I fear somebody I love so much. Proverbs 1:7 "the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge (understanding). Proverbs 1:28 tells us to seek the Lord or He will turn from us "they will call to me but I will not answer; they will look for me but will not find me, since they did not choose to fear me." What truly is fear? How does one describe it? I didn't quite get the fear thing. Why would God want us to fear him? I think of wilderness experiences. Are they really all bad, or is that sometimes part of God's plan to help us see who we really are? Even Jesus had to go to the wilderness to see who he really was. It's in those wilderness experiences that I found out how weak I was and how strong He is. I once asked Bill why he thought that we tried to protect our children from the valleys in life? Looking back now, would I have traded those valley experiences? Those are the moments that I surrendered it all and became more of what God wanted of me. I laid aside my plans and had no choice but to look up and see His plan. When you're at the base of the mountain do you just start climbing or do you study the terrain, searching, looking up focusing on the way to the other side. Or do you blindly start climbing? It finally dawned on me as I studied on in Proverbs that "fear" is really reverence or worship to God. Suggesting that when we properly acknowledge who He is and give him the reverence that he deserves....than we can understand "fear and trembling." I live today knowing that I don't fear God as we know fear, but I fear Him in reverence....and I tremble at his ultimate power in my life. Isn't it time for those of us that proclaim to be Christ followers to "fear and tremble" at his presence in our lives?

Two Roads Diverge in the Woods...

Do you remember the old Robert Frost poem? Two roads diverge in the woods and I-I took the one less traveled by...and it has made all the difference. I loved that poem from the first moment I heard it. How often we come to the paths in our lives where we stop and look down both paths. Though the one path is well worn and seems to be well traveled our hearts tell us to take the one less traveled by....because in taking it, it will make all the difference. I think of life prior to being a Christ follower, though the path was familiar, it brought no peace, it brought no comfort. Since taking the path less traveled by, I now walk in peace and joy. Not peace and joy as the world knows it, but a peace and joy that surpass understanding. Why do I tell you these things? Because for the past year in my quiet times I keep stumbling across "Pay attention, listen carefully" and "do not turn to the right or left," and "that is why you have been brought here." I feel as though I've been standing at this road that diverges, and want so badly to take the right path, to be obedient, to pay attention. But also a bit fearful of what I'm going to be asked to do when I start down that path. Am I equipped, did I pack the right supplies for the journey, OR, am I trying to pack to much for the journey? Am I the 0nly one that wonders what Abram did in Genesis 12:1 when God says "go to the land I will show you." Not that I have shown you, but that I WILL show you. What did Abram do? Did he step out of his townhouse and just stand there? I mean how did he know whether he was going to the left or to the right? Did he wonder if he was headed in the right direction? Was there billboards along the way, saying...this way Abram. Could use one of those billboards right now. The two roads diverge in the woods....and I'm standing at them......listening, paying attention and knowing I have been brought here for such a time as this...

the Simplicity of Life...

As I sat here tonight, my thoughts were of the simplicity of life, but yet how simple it isn't. As my heart and mind search scripture references to back up life being simple..I draw a blank. I look to the scripture for my source of strength, to give me a map through this life, to offer me hope of a better life yet to come. But yet as I look through scripture....I see David who's Psalms mostly cried out to God to hear his distress and help him through his rough times.....I see Job as he loses everything cry out to God in his painful affliction Job 19:2 "How long will you torment me". Paul....tortured. Daniel....for pete's sake.... wasn't being thrown in the fire enough, NO, he then was thrown into a den of lions. Do you know that "do not be afraid" is mentioned over 325 times in scripture, that is a "do not be afraid" for every day of the year. Where are we without the hope of scripture? We fail to look at scripture and look at our lives and see the same thing. Church as we knew it from our childhood has taught us that "to struggle" is to sin. Show me anywhere in scripture where a true Christ follower walked without fear, walked without feelings of defeat. True Christ following is not easy, has never been easy. We often want to paint Christianity as some glamorous picture. Christ following is often times a bloody battle, not fought easily without full armor. We often show a video at church of regular people like you and I holding a sword, not a small sword but an excaliber sword. And over and over again you hear them say "I will not be defeated, I will not be defeated, I will not be defeated." Ever, had one of those days when it would be easier to be OF the world than IN the world. Without scripture, without the hope of more glorious days...wouldn't it be easy to step away? I am reminded of being at Church camp as a camp counselor and Dave Atherton was preaching. YEAH Dave. Miss him so. He was preaching out of Romans 12. As he was preaching I found myself writing in the back of one of my bible's Romans 12:1 (my personalized version) Therefore, in view of your mercy, I offer myself as a living sacrifice, may it be holy and pleasing to you-may this be my spiritual act of worship. May I NO longer conform to the patterns of this world, but may I be transformed by the renewing of my mind. Then and only then will I be able to test and approve what your will for me is-your good, pleasing and perfect will. He never promised me this walk would be easy-he only promised that I wouldn't walk it alone.

After the suffering...

After the suffering of our soul, we will see the light of life and be satisfied. That is taken out of Isaiah. Two of my favorite chapters in the bible are Isaiah & 1st Peter. Ironically, Isaiah 53 was prophesy of 1st Peter, no wonder I like them both so much. 1st Peter in my bible looks more like a road map... underlines, circles, boxes, black ink, red ink and writing anywhere I could fit it... about what God was speaking to me as I read it. Isaiah 53 spoke of God's plan to send Jesus to suffer for us, Isaiah 53:10 "Yet is was the Lord's will to crush him and cause him to suffer, and though the Lord makes his life a guilt offering, he will see his offspring and prolong his days, and the will of the Lord will prosper in his hand. AFTER, the suffering of his soul, he will see the light of life, and be satisfied, by his knowledge my righteous servant will justify many and he will bear their iniquities." Throughout 1st Peter, Peter speaks of suffering, being made righteous because of his righteousness, that we are his elect (his chosen ones), a chosen and precious cornerstone. Do you know what a cornerstone does. Do you know the weight of responsibility of the cornerstone? God has given us a cornerstone, and the one who trusts in him will never be put to shame (1st Peter 2:6). The cornerstone is the whole house, without it... the house is inadequate and will fall. Attempt to build a foundation without it...and it will surely fail.

How's my foundation? Where is my strength from? When I face the suffering of my soul, will I look to the light of life to be satisified. I have to admit I fail on many occasions....as I'm working through the battles I feel much like the disciples in the boat as the storm was raging...they were frantic..while Jesus remained calm and in control of the whole situation. Why do we struggle so much with submission? I was listening to a sermon online today and he asked "why is it that we have such a hard time getting on our knees before God?" Are we afraid the world is going to kick us while we are down. Have we been so tainted by this world that we can't even let our guard down long enough to get low before God? Do you know that everytime an angel appeared to someone in the Old Testament that they couldn't help but get low, they fell...to their knees. Many fell flat on their faces. We miss God so many times. Shouldn't we have been flat on our faces along time ago. He has blessed us so. And for me, I will not be able to stand in His presence.

Dreams

God speaks many times to me in dreams. No, I don't get a house rattling voice. But the dreams that I get from God are so different than your run of the mill dream. There is a presence about them, there is a closeness that you don't feel in other dreams. I think he does that because we are so busy during the day and really don't take time to listen to the still small voice througout the day. On this one occasion I dreamt of a winged creature flying to me and touching my lip with a hot coal. I remember waking up and immediately feeling my lip thinking it should be burnt or hurt, but there was no pain. I remember hearing of this in scripture and set out to find it. I eventually found it in Isaiah 6:6 Then one of the seraphs flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, "See this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for." Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying. "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said "Here am I. Send Me!" That was at a time when I had been praying that God would use me, even though I knew I was in no way, shape or form worthy of use. But I soon realized its not about BEING worthy, its about being available, its about submitting to His will, His plan, His authority and the authority of the Church that He has put over me. From that day I realized "my sins have been atoned for, my guilt has been taken away" the gift is free, but costs us our very life. Being submitted to His plan doesn't come easy, we always seem to want to take the realm of the wheel again and try to guide the boat ourselves. I daily remind myself that its not about my plan, but its all about His. As Tim was preaching Sunday he taught out of Luke 9 he read vs 1 & 2. But for some reason both Bill and I read on into 3, as I read...."take nothing for the journey" jumped off the page at me, although I said nothing, Bill said outloud to me "take nothing with you." I found it ironic that we both heard the same thing. "Take nothing with you," we worry so much about food, money, material possesions...its all a part of us....but here Jesus reminds the disciples that there is no need...you won't need those things. Take nothing with you...everything you need will be given to you when you get there...if...and when you say "Here am I, Send Me." Worthiness isn't about our ability its about His ability...and our availability.

Neti-pot humor

A little neti-pot humor for tonight. No, I'm not doing any illegal stuff. My doctor recommended I try using a neti-pot to clean out the sinuses. So today after having a headache for which seemed like days I got one. Working up enough gumption to actually squirt warm water up into my nose and flush out the sinuses and let it pour out the other nostril takes alot of pre-thought process. Everything went fine, thanks for asking. I was actually surprised, it actually felt pretty good. BUT, then.....I make it a point to spend some time daily on my knees praising God and spending a few minutes in Un-distracted prayer. WELL, it was far from un-distracted. Have you ever tried to have a serious conversation with God when water is pouring out your nose all over the place. I just started laughing....hope God understands today...

On to a more serious note. I was pondering Tim's sermon from sunday. Yes, I really do listen and ponder!! I was thinking about him saying that we are deputized & authorized. That true Christ following is based on delegated authority. My thoughts today went to Ephesians 6:10 when Paul says "Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power, put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes." I remember so well the day Tim pulled back his arm in another message, with that arrow and shot it at the target (us). Today has been one of those days. God has gained such a victory in full use of our new building, but the enemy seeks to steal that victory by destroying the witness of our testimony. I believe that some things are spiritual warfare and some things are just pure coincidence. But the events of the past few days make me wonder coincidence or spiritual warfare. Many times after such a victory satan attempts to sneak in the back door and beat us down from behind. Just like a little mouse rounds your house until it finds one small hole to enter and cause caos. We lost 3 furnaces at our business today. Not one, not two, but THREE. Coincidence or spiritual warfare. Just as Bill was taking a sigh of relief from litigations, long nights with property development meetings, satan attempted to sneak in the back door. But what he didn't know was that we are equipped with the "full armor of God," and we are "deputized & authorized." Today he stands defeated one more time. I will continue to praise Him even in the storms.

Life as a Feather

Why do somedays feel more like a storm than a gentle breeze. I can't seem to begin to understand the pain of living, loving and loss. But I know as a Christ follower I have peace and comfort even in the storm. As I drove away from the church today, a small piece of cotton strand was floating around me, it swayed up, down and swirled around. It made me think of life. Life is much like that strand, its full of ups, downs and at times we feel swept away by its current. I am reminded of Paul's journey, his ability to persevere even in the worst of times. 2 Corinthians 6:4 "as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses. He continues on in vs 9 saying "we are known yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing, poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything. My heart aches for my dear friends (no, my dear families) loss. Elaine Lee our dedicated church financial secretary shared her last moment with her endearing husband Roy. Roy this morning went home to stand face to face with the God that we can only imagine. Today Roy knows no fear, no trouble, no hardships, no distress. Today Roy is rejoicing, he has nothing but possesses everything and he has made our lives rich in his memories. Today we begin a new chapter in Elaine's life as family. Together we will endure, we will know troubles, we will know hardships, but we will not go alone. We will go as a family, hand in hand, tear for tear, working towards our prize. 2 Timothy 4:7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race.

The Impact of a Song

Do you know I hear this song all the time, but today the impact of its words I cannot get out of my mind. In Luke, God sends an angel to a simple woman, not a woman of many accomplishments, but a woman humbled and ready to serve a call from God himself. Luke 1:28 The angel went to her and said, "Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you." then vs 30 says she found favor with God. But its vs 40 which has always spoke to my heart. "Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished." The song you have heard over and over, but do you really hear the words.

"Do you wonder as you watch my face,
if a wiser one should have had my place,
But I offer all I am, for the mercy of your plan.
Help me be strong. Help me be. Help me.
Breath of heaven, hold me together.
Lighten my darkness, pour over me your holiness.
Breath of Heaven.

I often wonder .....why? Why do you not choose a wiser one to take my place. I am so weak, I am so not worthy of your calling Lord. But yet you call. And I offer all that I am....

Jeremiah 33:3 Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.

Deep thoughts tonight

Some very deep thoughts tonight. Was blessed to be able to work today. But with work comes some very deep life issues. As I was face to face with a woman that should not be facing death at such a young age, through her tears she asks "Do you think God hears my prayers?," I tell her "He hears them all." She then proceeds to ask me "Do you think he's tired of hearing me ask for healing." NO! God never tires of hearing anything his children have to say to him. Why do we think of God as someone that we cannot be angry with, someone that we cannot cry to, someone that we cannot yell at. God has called us into fellowship with him, he longs for a deep relationship with us. Relationships face good times, bad times, and all the ups and downs, we get angry with one another, but out of love we return to the one that we love with a deeper closeness. I am deciding today which is more important living or dying. What is the guarantee of a tomorrow and what have I done with today? And though I live my life, it will be the dying day that will determine my true future. Will you stand before him and hear "Good and faithful servant" or will you hear "away from me, I never knew you." May your today truly make a difference....

Zechariah 4:1 Then the angel who talked with me returned and wakened me, as a man is wakened from his sleep. He asked me, "What do you see?" vs 6 This is the word of the Lord to Zerubbabel: NOT by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit.' says the Lord Almighty. What are you, O mighty mountain? Before Zerubbabel you will become level ground. Then he will bring out the capstone to shouts of "God Bless it! God Bless it!" Then the word of the Lord came to me: The hands of Zerubbabel have laid the foundation of this temple; his hands will also complete it. Then you will know that the Lord Almighty has sent me to you. Funny how God has to wake us up sometimes to see what he is showing us. Have we been sleeping? I think maybe in our flesh feeling discouraged, frustrated and wandering if all this would ever end. But today God has gained victory and after a 3 year battle for the ability to worship in our new building. God is victorious. He is laying the final capstone. Capstones were the final piece of the building of the temple. And God said the hands that started it would complete it. And shouts will be heard, "God Bless It, God Bless it." It has been a very rough journey as a church family. But I can't imagine having walked it with anyone else. Our church is a church of perseverance, and God is now blessing that perseverance and expecting great things from his people.

Lots of thoughts today. Scriptures running through my head. Women's conference things to be done yet. Family needs to be met. My thoughts are very much focused on Christmas. I am baffled every year. I cannot honestly imagine going through the labor and pain of childbirth, raising and loving my beautiful child, only to give him up for a bunch of unworthy, ungrateful and sinful generation. Could you hand your dear one over? It may be Christmas, but my heart is still full of Thanksgiving.

Wow what a day

Wow, it has been a busy day. Worked on our Womens Conference this morning. Our theme this year is Amazing Grace....the legacy. We will be talking about Grace and the legacy that we leave to those that follow us. Ran by the church to pick up some registration forms. Noon meeting with 3 fabulous gals from church that are working on the conference with me. It is amazing how God uses us all so differently. We discussed dramas for the conference. Came back home worked on conference some more, twitted some friends, then downloaded scribus to begin working on the program. Supper of hamburgers and homemade fries, then sent Bill off to his transition team meeting for the church, as we transition from the misconceptual church to a church that Jesus would want to attend. I love my husband so much. It is such a secure feeling to have a husband that is so rooted in his faith. Sent Morgan off to youth group. Caught a quick hot bath, then tried to do the tutorial on scribus. Am learning that I am not as young and as quick to learn as I used to be. I found myself pausing and rewinding to try and get it. We are preparing for the Konneker Christmas this weekend. David, Heidi, Jadyn & Matthan arrive in town on Friday. YEAH!! Matthan changes so much every time we see him. It is now 11:30 and should be sleeping.