Watchman....

Gosh, I wanted to avoid this post like the plague. I can't believe a week has gone by since my last post. Where is the time going and why is it going so fast. I had to change my weekly post on the bathroom mirror. Each week I try to write something on our mirror that will be ever in our presence throughout the week. Reminding us of His power and His authority in our lives. Today's will be as simple as "Urgency." I keep hearing God say the time is urgent. It's been about 3 months ago now. I was trying to make sense of some of the scriptures I had heard at various times in my day. They were'nt scriptures that I was randomly thinking about. But in the midst of my daily activities I heard them clear as day. ALL of them are talking about end times events. Something no one wants to hear about let alone hear from God. My thoughts are/were why do you keep giving me these? Why do you keep leading me in this way? What purpose do I have in that? After talking to a friend and mentioning this she began praying for me. Ironically she said that she felt like God was saying I was to be a watchman. I'm sorry to say that I took her comment with a grain of salt. Didn't really think much more about it. Like what was a "watchman" supposed to mean anyway? But God in his sense of humor or perhaps in his sense of urgency, started leading me to all kinds of scriptures with watchman. Trust me I wasn't looking for them. I was laying in bed one night and I heard Ezekiel 33. Of course out of my curiosity I got up and opened my bible to Ezekiel 33, only to find that it is all about the watchman. And how the watchman will be held accountable if they do not do what God asks of them. YIKES. And then this sunday, please forgive me Tim. But as Tim was preaching out of John 10 he always gives us some context to go with the scripture that he is focusing on. As he began to read John 10 he got to verse 2 & 3 "The man who enters by the gate is the shepherd of his sheep. The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice." That last verse jumped off the pages at me. I have read John time and time again. WHY had I never seen watchman before? Why now? I do feel His urgency, but really don't feel equipped to manage the call. In our flesh we are so afraid of being wrong that it often keeps us from stepping out and doing what God has asked. As I was doing my study in Esther for class this week. I read in chapter 4:14 "For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place BUT you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?" Nothing in me wants to be the fool. But everything in me says I have less to lose by being faithful to what I am hearing. Ezekiel 33: 6 "But if the watchman sees the sword coming and does not blow the trumpet to warn the people and the sword comes and takes the life of ONE OF THEM that man will be taken away because of his sin, but I will hold the watchman accountable for his blood." I know that all God is asking me is to be the watchman to stand at the gate and OPEN the gate for Him to enter. There are so many lives at stake, their all dying from deadly diseases, cancer, AID's, strokes, heart attacks and viruses. And me being the medical person that I am seek to save their lives from all their medical issues. BUT yet there is a world dying without HOPE and yet I do nothing? Why do I fear rejection for merely trying to save their eternal life but have no qualms about saving their physical life? Help me Lord, I fail you so much. Speak....your servant is listening.

Ninty Nine Percent...

I was shocked...no, more amazed...perhaps appauled, at what I heard the other day. Ninty-nine percent of people polled when given the option of staying here or going to heaven, right now....said, they would chose to stay here! WHAT? Now, I am a nurse. I have dedicated my life to the betterment of others lives. And in that.... my duty, my obligation is to at all cost save your life, unless you have a document that specifically prohibts me from doing such. My worse fear came true, about a year ago. One of my favorite patients whom I had taken care of numerous times had told me of being ready to go home. As a matter of fact I was there as he filled out his living will instructing us to NOT bring him back to this world in event that his heart would stop. I had grown quite close to him, he had just turned ninty and he was a very young an energetic ninty, always so appreciative of his nurse help, always with a warm smile and something pleasant to say. I had learned in our many conversations that he and my grandfather had been playmates as children. Which made my connection with him ever more close. So you can imagine my horror when the ER calls a code one night. My shift was actually getting ready to end. I volunteered to go down and assist in the code. Most of you that have never been in a situation where someones heart stops and we begin resuscitation don't know that the abdomen often blows up very large due to our ventilations, the head and face can become so blue to purple the person is often unrecognizable. As a matter of fact in the rush of the moment and doing what comes natural I hadn't even noticed WHO we were actually working on. As someone in the ER says his name.....my hearts jumps in my chest....and I begin to tell them to STOP. He did not want this, he wanted to go peacefully into his saviors arms, he didn't want someone sticking tubes down him, beating on his chest, shocking him and sticking him with needles. NO ONE would stop. They wanted to see his paperwork saying such. I was horrified that this man I assured would not have to go through this was now being put through literal HELL. Finally one of his sons arrived and was able to get them to stop. Why do we fight so hard for this life? Why do we place SO much value on our earthly life? Do we fail to see...this is not what we were created for. We were created for relationship with God. We were created to dwell someday with him in paradise. Revelation 21 & 22 "Then the angel showed me the river of the water of life, as clear as crystal, flowing from the throne of God. The wall was made of jasper and the city of pure gold, as pure as glass. The foundations of the city walls were decorated with every kind of precious stone. There will be no more death, or mourning or crying or pain. Everything will be made new." Does this really sound like something that we are willing to sacrifice for THIS life. Is this life of so much value to us that we will continue on with our pain, our suffering, our tears, our hardships, our days of uncertainty. I have a living will. I am only 38 years old. My nurse friends struggle with my decision. But I ask them, "if I was leaving for Jamaica tomorrow, would you try and stop me?," over and over again they say "No, way." I say to them "I am going to a place that is Jamaica TEN times over, don't stop me." Oh the day that I get to walk down those streets of gold and I get to gaze with wonder at water so clear that you have to touch it to make sure that it is even there. Don't get me wrong. I value what life God has given me here. I find such beauty in the things He has shown me thus far....but this life is not something that I cling to. On the day that I go home, I truly expect a party from those that I have left behind. If only I could give them just a glimpse of what I will be seeing. Oh what a glorious day that will be. I guess you could count me in the 1%.

Accountability as a Shepherd....

Don't usually post an image this large, but in order to see the fine detail of a single lost sheep, you almost have to look very close to see it. As I was studying yesterday my studies somehow led me to Ezekiel 33... Ezekiel 33 holds us very accountable as shepherds. I think we all would like to think that only our pastors will be held accountable as a shepherd....but in all reality as a Christ-follower we all have been appointed to shepherd the flock (the lost). And we too will be held accountable for what we do or do not...do. Ezekiel 34 says "woe to the Shepherds of Israel who only take care of themselves! Should not shepherds take care of the flock?" It goes on to say in vs 5 "so they were scattered because there was no shepherd." As we see the signs of the times surrounding us, we should be ever more aggressive in tending to the sheep, but it seems the average church today fails so much in doing so. The verses in between are to convicting to us. Ezekiel 34: 3-4 says..."You eat the curds, clothe yourself with the wool and slaughter the choice animals, but you do not take care of the flock. You have not strengthened the weak or healed the sick or bound up the injured. You have not brought back the strays or searched for the lost. You have ruled them harshly and brutally." The average church is so good at turning away the lost. I heard somewhere the other day that Ghandi actually had made a decision to turn his life over to Christianity from Buddhism but on the very night that he was going to do such....he entered the church ready to listen to the message and meet with the pastor after the service...but upon his entering the front door he was immediately informed that he was not welcome there because of his faith. WHAT did they know of his faith? They only knew what they assumed and by their assumption...Ghandi never came to a relationship with Christ. I am so blessed to be a part of a church that believes in the fact that we are all sinners saved by grace. We have nothing to offer but everything to give. We welcome those that have fallen, as we have been flat on our faces before...we know that pain too well. We embrace the brokenhearted...as our hearts to have been broken. We do not seek out an individuals sin....as it is not ours to judge, we embrace them for who they are in Christ...a sheep without a shepherd. As we go out today, may we see the urgency in the world, may we see the signs and may we not just see people may we see sheep....lost sheep looking for a shepherd. May we lead those very sheep to the rest of the flock. We will be held accountable for all the ones that we lose along the way. Help me Lord to see the sheep that you send my way.